There were still a couple of months left before Nadya’s birthday, and I thought about making the book a present for her thirtieth birthday, but I just couldn’t pull myself together. I was anxious, nervous, and kept putting it off. Even before that, when I was still seeing my psychologist Lena, I tried to maintain contact with Nadya, visiting different places and sharing my impressions with her. For example, when I went to the Oakland Museum, I sent her photos of the exhibits dedicated to the city’s history and the art of the indigenous peoples. I thought she might find it interesting, given her curiosity. Later, I visited the California Academy of Sciences in San Francisco—an impressive science center. I recorded videos for Nadya of coral reefs, marine creatures, and underwater landscapes to share the beauty and the atmosphere of scientific discovery with her.
However, after talking with Lena, I decided to take a break and stop bothering Nadya. What if it was starting to tire her? I decided to give her space and time, so she could live her own life peacefully without feeling pressured by me.
I truly decided to shift my focus and try to socialize more in the USA. I thought I needed to find someone to talk to—a friend to spend time with. I started thinking about how and where to look. Eventually, I found out online that one of the popular apps for connecting with neighbors in California was Nextdoor. I downloaded it, installed it on my phone, and posted an ad: “Hey guys, who wants to go hiking with me?”
I received several interesting replies. First, I was invited to join a hiking group on Facebook. Second, I was contacted by a guy from India, who also suggested going hiking. We met up at a cafe, got to know each other, chatted, and then he said he had to go to the dentist. That was how our friendship started, and we began texting each other in chat. Later, through Nextdoor, we stumbled upon another guy, who admitted that it was difficult for him to make friends as an adult. I wrote to him and invited him to join our company. That made three of us, and we created a group chat on WhatsApp.
Meanwhile, I got a reply on Nextdoor from a girl named Meeta. She told me that she found friends through board games and now organizes them herself. Meeta invited me to join, and I agreed. At the first game night, I met another friend, Johnny (who is Chinese by nationality), and I added him to our group chat. So our group, which I started calling the “Fight Club,” kept growing.
By this time, I couldn’t stand it any longer. It had been a whole month since I’d decided not to write to Nadya, but it was getting pretty boring and hard for me. I wanted to share my news with her again, to tell her what had happened during that time. So, after a month, I started texting her again.
I sent her different songs via WhatsApp, and everything was relatively calm until one day, when I was drunk, I wrote her a message: “Do you remember how we met? I wonder, when I went into the women’s restroom, did I go through the right door or not?” Apparently, Nadya took these messages as a form of pressure. She reacted in the way she does best—she removed her profile picture from WhatsApp so it wasn’t visible to everyone. Of course, it was sad to find this out, but, thank God, she didn’t block me.
In June 2024, I went to Oregon for a four-day rafting trip on the Rogue River, which flows into the Pacific Ocean. It was an amazing adventure, full of both natural and historical discoveries. One of the most memorable places we visited was the Rogue River Ranch—a historic ranch that is an important part of the region’s cultural heritage. The ranch was one of the key sites during the settlement of the Wild West and played a significant role in the history of the area. Today, it serves as a reminder of the lives of the first settlers who lived and worked under harsh conditions. The ranch’s museum has exhibits related to ranchers and the history of the Rogue River.
We also stopped at Whisky Creek Cabin—a historic cabin built in the late nineteenth century during the Gold Rush. It was a place for gold prospectors to rest as they made their way along the river in search of fortune. Today, this little house is a monument to the early period of America’s settlement and remains untouched, preserving the atmosphere of that era.
We also passed by the place where the writer Zane Grey lived and worked, a famous author of books about the Wild West. In 1925, he traveled the Rogue River by boat and fell so in love with the region that he decided to settle there. He bought a piece of land, built a house, and spent a lot of time there, drawing inspiration for his books. In his works, you can feel the wild and untamed spirit of these places, and being there, you can imagine how Grey watched this nature as he wrote his stories.
The rafting trip itself was full of challenges. We navigated rapids of varying difficulty levels—from calm waters to truly turbulent flows that required our full concentration and coordinated efforts. Each day brought something new, and by the end of the trip, our group had become a real team.
It was an amazing adventure, especially because I found myself in the company of wonderful people with whom we quickly became friends. Every day was full not only of natural beauty, but also of warm moments of connection. Our guides were fantastic—not only helping us technically, but also creating a light and friendly atmosphere. One of them was Abigail, a fair-haired girl with an infectious smile. She was always ready to start a conversation and bring fun into any moment.
On the last night, I suggested a few games that Nadya had once shown me when we were together. Among them were the game “Contact” and various versions of the game “Hike.” These games were more than just entertainment—they created a true sense of unity in the group. The guys especially enjoyed “Hike”—after a few rounds, they started making up their own rules and variations, and everyone contributed something of their own. This quickly created an incredibly warm and friendly atmosphere, with everyone laughing, supporting each other, and just enjoying the moment.
Later that evening, one of the women from the group came up to me and thanked me for making the evening so special. That moment was particularly meaningful for me—realizing that I hadn’t just contributed to the fun, but helped create memories that would last a long time.
July 4th arrived. Even though I had been invited to play board games that day, I decided to take an extra day off on Friday, July 5th. And July 4th—the Independence Day holiday in the USA—was a day off as well. On that day, I didn’t go to play games but decided to go to Yosemite Park, one of the most famous national parks in the USA.
I drove there in my car and rented a hotel room in the city of Mariposa, not far from the park, so that I could come back and stay overnight after walking around. When I arrived at the hotel to check in, they told me that you could not get into the park without a reservation—all the spots were taken. I thought, why make a reservation if I just want to walk around a little? Plus, their website said that after 4:00 p.m., you could enter without a reservation if you were not planning to camp. In the end, I went to the park and was able to get in.
The place was stunningly beautiful. I walked to the lake, strolled between campgrounds, walked along the river and between the mountains—the views were breathtaking. I happily walked along the trails, enjoying the nature. There were many interesting houses there; people came, rented cozy cabins, and lived there. Many people were also vacationing in RVs and tents. People went hiking along different routes and probably stayed in wilder corners of the park.
On my way back to the hotel, I faced an unexpected problem. When I drove into the city, I was told the road was closed and the exit was blocked. I had no idea what had happened and was directed in another direction. A bit confused, I decided to follow the map via alternative routes. At some point, I drove out of the area and was shocked: everything around was burning, and the sky was red from the fire. When I got to Mariposa, where my hotel was, it became clear that there was a wildfire raging. The hills were engulfed in flames, and helicopters circled in the sky.
The police were stationed at the hotel. I was worried they would not let me through, but after explaining my situation, they allowed me to pass since I was staying there. I started recording videos of the fire and reading news about what had happened. The sight was both terrifying and mesmerizing. In the morning, I decided to go home—this was enough adventure for one trip.
On July 17, 2024, I decided to attend an event I found on the Meetup app. It was called “Make International Friends in San Jose,” and it turned out to be quite an interesting experience. The meeting took place in a cafe, and a huge number of people gathered there. The evening was lively: we talked a lot, met new people, and exchanged stories and impressions.
Several people stood out to me in particular. One of them was Carly—a woman I met as soon as I entered the cafe. When I walked in, I didn’t know who was organizing the event or where it was taking place, so I just sat down at the bar and started looking at the menu. At that moment, a woman sitting nearby noticed and said, “That’s not the right menu—here’s the right one.” That’s how our acquaintance began. She introduced herself as Carly, and together we found the event organizers. Later, a guy named Jemis joined us, and I quickly became friends with him too.
There was also a young Indian man who worked at Facebook. He told me about his project developing augmented reality glasses. It was really interesting, especially since augmented reality is becoming an increasingly important part of technology.
As for Carly, she turned out to be a very interesting person. Her father, like Jemis’s father, was from the Philippines, and after our conversation I even decided to learn more about the history of that country, which fascinated me. Later, Carly and I met again, and this time we decided to visit the Mystery Spot—an unusual place near Santa Cruz, known for its visual illusions and strange gravitational anomalies. The place was opened in 1941 and became one of California’s most mysterious tourist attractions. Everything there seemed upside-down: things rolled uphill, and when standing upright, you felt tilted. It was a fascinating and strange sensation.
After that, we went to the Seymour Marine Discovery Center, also in Santa Cruz. It is a marine research center where you can learn a lot about marine life, oceanography, and ocean conservation. We looked at exhibits with marine creatures and learned more about how the ocean depths are studied. It was a wonderful day, full of new discoveries and bright impressions. However, after that, Carly and I didn’t go anywhere else together.
On August 1, I unexpectedly found a letter from Abigail in my mailbox. It was incredibly nice and unexpected. In the letter, she wrote:
Dear Igor,
You were a real joy for the whole group on this trip. Your infectious laughter made everyone around join in the fun. Seeing you navigate the rapids in an inflatable kayak was amazing, and we absolutely loved the games you showed us on the last night! I hope to see you again on the next rafting trip!
The letter was also signed by other members of the group, who thanked me for sharing the beauty of nature with them. It was just awesome and left me with incredibly warm feelings.
 |
 |
|---|---|
| Front side of the postcard | Inside letter of the postcard |
This was an important time for me. I finally felt ready to tell my story, to write this book, and to put all the dots over the “i” in my life. I was tired of having a huge number of misunderstandings spinning around in my head, misunderstandings with different people throughout my life. These misunderstandings arose simply because people did not know about the huge experiences I had gone through, and made shallow judgments. My book is not just an account of events—it is my story, through which I want to show my path and explain what was behind all these meetings, mistakes, and decisions. I want those who know me to finally see the whole picture, and not just fragments of it.
